Hose Us Down and Lock Us Up

I did not manage to contract Pink Eye for the first time in my life. And of course there is no way that I would have gotten it from my Father. That's just crazy! And if I did contract Pink eye, there is little chance that I went to work less than 24 hours after getting the antibiotic drops, sequester myself in my office and prominently display a bottle of Purell just in case someone needed to talk to me. That would just be cruel to my co-workers.

I did not KNOWINGLY walk around for an entire evening with Ellis' puke on my shirt. I mean, even if I was constantly cleaning it up, I would certainly have changed my shirt.

I did not drop an egg when taking it out of the fridge. And I was not AMAZED that it was sitting on the bottom shelf of the fridge with NO shell in it. So, I wouldn't have scooped it into a measuring cup and used it in the banana bread. [BTW, Ellis did not eat the bread...]

I did not go shopping, only to get to the check out and discover that my debit card was not in my purse. And that even though I had my checkbook, that my Driver's license was missing, too. And I tried not to be too angry and embarrassed, when Chase informed me [and the check out lady] that she had put them next to the cat bowl! And then of course, I would have had them BACK in my purse the next day. I wouldn't have had to ask where they went to again? Right? Only to have Ellis fish them out from under the Couch! Apparently, I need a padlock for my purse.